Growing up too fast

This past weekend, I got a little freaked out.

Many people I’m very close to will be graduating in less than a week. In two years, I will be, too.

I’ve always been fiercely independent and tried to act like a “grown-up,” even when I was far from one. But the thought that soon I’m going to have to fend for myself in the scary thing we call “real life” is a little mind-boggling.

The past two years have been by far the best I’ve ever had. But even as I continue to learn and grow at IU, I’m still nervous about (hopefully) becoming an actual job-holding adult four semesters from now.

Do you remember when people would ask what you wanted to be when you grew up? Heck, I still get asked that today — and my answer is only slightly more certain than it was when I wore Power Ranger underwear and complained when homework assignments involving coloring were “hard.”

Back then, I wanted to be a mailman. Our neighborhood mail carrier, Jim, was an awesome guy, and I aspired to be just like him someday. However, I realized that delivering mail meant I would have to brave the frigid cold of winter to bring people their water bills and issues of Vogue, and I quickly soured on that path.

Next, I vowed to become a librarian. I was obsessed with reading, and I idolized my school librarian, Mrs. Wala. However, this was the time of my life when I began to learn about money, and I wanted to earn a lot of it — fast. So, I changed my career goal to lawyer.

Other professions that I’ve considered at various times include doctor, journalist, businessman, singer/actor/teen idol and economist.

So here I am, a sophomore in college, still with little to no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.

Am I a little worried? Yes. But looking at the (haphazard) evolution of my career goals makes me confident that I’ll find something someday — with any luck, sooner rather than later.

My parents always encouraged me to pursue things I found to be interesting. They told me they just wanted me to find a job that would allow me to support myself and be happy.

With that in mind, I guess I’ll join the circus.

­— biglehar@indiana.edu