The Academy plays to its weaknesses

Let’s face it, the Academy Awards are generally a pompous, self-congratulatory affair that cannot be watched all the way through by those of us who don’t buy every Criterion Collection DVD.

But this year, the Academy and ABC have gone out of their way to appeal to the general public. Or, as they probably like to refer to us, “the idiots who let ‘Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen’ become one of the highest grossing films of all time.”

Anyway, here is a rundown of all the changes you’ll see during this year’s telecast.

More Best Picture nominees: This one has been talked about for months, but it remains the most interesting topic. In an attempt to pacify folks who don’t have the opportunity to see traditional “Oscar films,” the academy extended the Best Picture field from five to 10, which led to nominations for quality box-office successes like “District 9” and “Up” as well as just-on-the-outside smaller gems like “An Education” and “A Serious Man.” Oh, and that “Blind Side” bullshit we won’t mention.

More speeches: Instead of the traditional “thank-you” speech, the winners this year will spend their time on stage talking about what their Oscar win “means” to them. They’ll then save the family/agent/God babbling for an online-only camera backstage. This is as dumb as it sounds.

More hosts: For the first time in five decades, two people will preside over the festivities. Show-stopper Alec Baldwin shares the stage with two-time host Steve Martin. Two might not be better than one in this case, but at least it won’t be as bad as the Emmys’ five-piece reality show debacle of 2008.

No Best Original Song performances: Traditionally, the Best Original Song nominees get to perform their songs live, something that always spices up the festivities. So of course that’s gone this year. Instead, the nominees’ songs will play over montages of the films they come from. Because the Oscar telecast needs more montages.

Will these changes get more people to watch? Probably not. But will they be more entertaining? Probably not. So, good move all around.