Choose at your peril

The Indiana primary is upon us, and for once the votes of Indiana Democrats will matter. ’Tis time for careful consideration.\nAt this point in the news cycle, election coverage has wreaked absolute havoc on my mind, body and soul. When I read a pun on Barack Obama’s name, my eyes bleed. When I hear about Hillary Clinton’s unelectability, my ears implode. \nWhen I think about my choice between the two, my brain melts. \nFortunately for you all who have not jeopardized your sanity by devouring election news, the story is pretty simple. These two have almost identical policy positions. You’re voting on an image and a governing philosophy.\nFor your convenience, I have compiled a list of the three worst things about both Democrats. Decide which set seems more horrible to you, and vote accordingly.\nFirst, the Hill:\n1. She wants to obliterate Iran. While we were all up in arms over Obama’s elitism, Clinton was threatening to obliterate a civilization. In true Bush fashion, she was making Iran’s nuclear policy (a non-issue, according to the NIE report from November) a big issue. Threatening to bomb Iran into oblivion doesn’t make me think Clinton is tough and no-nonsense; it makes me think we could all look forward to another eight years of needlessly aggressive foreign policy. \n2. Her reign, more so than even G.W. Bush’s, will be the continuation of a dynastic line. Madeleine Albright shows up to Hillary functions; Bill stands behind her; the '90s crowd follows her like a shadow. Is this an election, or a carefully staged coup by America’s ruling elite?\n3. Republicans hate her. I know, I know – I hate it when people bring this up, too. The “vast right wing conspiracy” may not exist, but a Republican smear machine certainly does. It impeached her husband, contributed to the failure of her health care plan in the '90s and planted the seeds of irrational, misogynist and mass mistrust of her in the hearts of many Americans. I don’t know if we can take eight years of our executive branch on the defensive, or worse, on trial. \nNow, the Barack:\n1. Unity equals listening to Republicans. Don’t fall for the new-agey, feel-good political philosophy. Change will not happen through politely considering everyone’s concerns. Change was John Edwards’ platform: The wrong people have the power (big pharmacies, insurance companies and other lobbies) and we have to take it from them! Want eight years of listening to the wrong people? Vote Barack.\n2. He’s got no health care mandate. This is a huge deal. He demonizes Clinton’s plan and attacks it from the right, claiming she’s “forcing” Americans to buy a plan they cannot afford. This is not true. His plan will simply not provide health care for all Americans.\n3. He’s got more highfalutin rhetoric than he does concrete plans. Yes, that’s the cliche, but some cliches exist because they are true. Clinton has solutions; Barack has strong theoretical underpinnings for his presidency ... but is that all?\nChoose at your own peril.