I rhombus you

The word "heart" has several meanings. \nThe heart is a vital organ that pumps blood through the circulatory system. Heart is a rock band from Seattle featuring the vocals of Ann Wilson and the guitar skills of Nancy Wilson. Heart is also the power possessed by the Planeteer Ma-Ti from the hit '90s cartoon "Captain Planet." If you'll recall, he had a pet spider monkey.\nBut "heart" has become something more sinister. Deep inside the hospital of American vernacular is a ward for dying catch phrases. Lying on a bed, barely grasping onto life is the phrase, "I heart (insert noun of choice)."\nThere are members of our society leaning over the hospital bed, clutching the hand of said catch phrase, whispering reassuring words. Yes, these are people who still use "heart" as a verb. I heart New York. I heart Pan-Asian cuisine. I heart you.\nI hereby make my plea to society: Disconnect the life support. Let it die.\nNo one ever quite knows how a catch phrase begins. It's kind of like the birth of the universe. Maybe it was created by the hand of God. Maybe there was a big bang. We don't know. It just kind of happened. The most obvious direction to point a finger is northeast to New York City where vendors sell the infamous "I (shape of heart) NY" T-shirts at every street corner.\nPerhaps one day someone too clever for his own good decided to take the heart shape literally. It was no longer a pictorial abbreviation for love. The heart moved out on its own.\nToday, we find "heart" overworked and ready to die of exhaustion. We know slang is overused when it loses all meaning. But what does "I heart whatever" mean in the first place? Is it a synonym for "like" or a synonym for "love"? Is it the median between like and love? No one knows.\nI think it's a good verb for people who are afraid of commitment. "I heart you" sounds good, but it means nothing. It makes just as much sense as saying, "I hexagon you." It's time we started getting creative. If you're stuck on "heart," look to Lucky Charms for shape inspiration. When will the diamond or the pot-o-gold get time to shine?\nA study of slang conducted by the communications department of California Polytechnic State University said the content of what we say is a message about our identity. Using old catch phrases that make people nauseous not only displays a lack of creativity and individuality but also portrays the identity of a dead and brutally beaten horse.\nTo inform the public of which phrases have passed into the realm of taboo, we need to elect a Lexicon Master. The Master will decide which slang has become outdated. The first item on the Master's docket will be the heart. From now on, it is no longer socially acceptable to "heart" anything. If you insist upon publicly declaring how much you "heart" everything, prepare to be banned from society. I also propose the formation of a Slang Police.\nIf we can eliminate just one irritating catch phrase, the world will be a better place. The English language will be a little more pure.\nAnyone who says "I heart ... " will be locked away in a detention center. The heart offender will be shoved into a dark cell with a cell mate who sits in the corner muttering, "Fo' sheezey my neezey."\nPolluting our language with trite phrases dilutes the effectiveness of communication. Think of it this way -- every time someone says, "I heart blank," a puppy dies. Nobody hearts a dead puppy.