15 high-tech minutes

Somewhere between a flying penis and someone's virginity, IU freshman Joe Minkner is tempting the limits of inappropriate things to sell along the information highway roadside. Beginning Wednesday, bids to buy Minkner's roommate began rolling in on eBay. \nThe description reads: "Used (but semi-clean) item shows some signs of wear and tear usual for its age. Only in one accident which resulted in minor body damage to the shoulder -- was fixed by local body shop (hospital) and comes with all paperwork." \nMinkner got the idea to sell his roommate from a recent story about a woman who sold her deceased father's cane on eBay to calm her son's fears about a lurking ghost. The bids escalated to a top offer of $65,000. If a mother can sell the spirit of her late father, why couldn't Minkner sell an authentic Hoosier hottie? \nReality TV, www.thefacebook.com, www.hotbod.com and now eBay all demonstrate our newfound affinity for self-promotion. In today's e-America, everybody's a star. \nStill, there's something that merits close examination about rating the "hotness" of our friends or keeping tabs on the number of other people we're connected to through mutual acquaintances. Couldn't we find our self-esteem within ourselves instead of from the opinions of complete strangers? \nGranted, most of these pranks are funny. Our post-modern tendencies delight in the deconstruction of e-commerce, dating services and the traditional sitcom. However, our sharp wits only get us so far once we actually place foot within the medium we're attempting to destroy. We become players in the farce -- not its critics. \nThough it is hard to escape the temptation of seeking our own fame when this age of technology facilitates our own public relation machines, we must realize that any fame won so easily isn't fame worth having. Instead of searching for affirmation from strangers, log off TheFacebook, and actually pick up the phone to call those long-lost elementary school buddies. \nIn the end, perhaps Bloomington knows better. While Thursday afternoon Minker's roommate's going price was up in the four-digit category, by 10 p.m., the extravagent promises had been retracted, placing a price on the student's fame more appropriate to the effort they exerted in trying to obtain it: $14.50\nIt's probable that over the next few days, the bids on Minkner's roomie will increase. And while that's not a sure thing, one thing is -- Minkner's fame is ticking away as steadily as the three days left on the bid.\nAnd to that we say, "Going once, going twice .."