Finding comfort in a TV slayer

Freshman Brianna Jacobson has flown 16,800 miles to and from Indianapolis and Los Angeles to quench her addiction for the sitcom "Buffy the Vampire Slayer." For the past four years, she has hung out with hundreds of other "Buffy" fans at conventions that celebrate the show. \nWhile thousands of high school and college students tune in to "Buffy" weekly, the show is more than average entertainment to Jacobson. It has comforted her during difficult times. And the conventions have allowed her to meet and befriend one of the show's actresses.\n"(The convention) gives me strength, mentally and emotionally," Jacobson said. "It keeps me going. Plus it's an honor to meet all of the actors and actresses. Not everybody gets to meet their favorite actors on their favorite show."\nJacobson last went to a convention, called a "Posting Board Party," a week and a half ago. The conventions draw about 200 fanatics each year, said Brianna Jacobson's mother, Debbie, who attends the gatherings with her daughter.\nAt the conventions, "Buffy" enthusiasts watch bands from the show play live. Actors from the show mingle with the crowd. Sarah Michelle Gellar, who plays Buffy, is the only one who hasn't shown up, Jacobson said. \nAuctions and raffles give away show memorabilia -- autographed CDs and scripts, cast wardrobe and props -- and as much as $30,000 in proceeds each year go to charity.\nAt a convention, Jacobson met Amber Benson, who plays Tara on the show. Jacobson said she started chatting with Benson, and they realized they were both interested in the same band performing that day. At another convention, Benson went onstage and acknowledged Jacobson as her best friend.\n"That's one moment I'll never forget," Jacobson said. "All of these actors you think are snobby, but they are so nice and beautiful and interesting. I feel special and important that I met that person."\nJacobson learned about the conventions through a chat room on the old, official "Buffy" Web site. The chat room, named the "Bronze" after a hangout on the show, organizes the conventions. \n"Buffy" became Jacobson's favorite show when she was tackling a difficult transition. At age 13, she moved from Lancaster, Pa., to San Jose, Calif. She had a hard time adjusting to the change, but related to the show and its characters. \n"Buffy" chronicles a high school student who battles demons and vampires while struggling with regular personal problems like dealing with separated parents, troublesome boyfriends and snobby cliques. The show is set in "Hellmouth," a metaphor for high school as hell.\n"I had no friends for a while and I would turn on the TV and see a girl who had just moved to a new school too," Jacobson said. "She always held her head up high despite the circumstances. I said, 'I want to be like that,' or 'What would Buffy do?'"\nShe said she realized her commitment to the show when she saw the finale of the second season, when Buffy kills her vampire boyfriend Angel.\n"It was the first time I had ever cried (during) a television show, and I thought, 'This isn't just a show,'" she said. "That was when I knew I was a big freak." \nJacobson said each week's episode seemed to resemble her life. \n"The day I left for college, there was an episode about Buffy going to college and fighting with her roommate," Jacobson said. "I felt like I was going through the same things as her. She's a great role model." \nAfter she adjusted to the move and college, Jacobson said the show evolved into a type of family for her. Through the conventions, she has met lifelong friends.\n"I feel like a part of a group, and it makes me feel good about myself to know people who have a common interest like me," she said. "Once you're in the 'Buffy' family, you're in forever. That's why it's unique."\nFreshman Kathleen Hampton, a close friend of Jacobson's, said Jacobson can always count on the show. \n"I think it's giving her something despite all of the moving, and (it's) giving her something to fall back on," Hampton said. \nWhenever she feels homesick, she sorts through her four videotapes and 16 DVDs of three seasons of the show. But Jacobson said she maintains a clear line between fantasy and fiction. "Buffy" simply amuses her.\n"She is a very avid fan, but it does not take over her life as it does some of the other people at the convention," Jacobson's mother, Debbie, said. "She has a life besides 'Buffy.'" \nJacobson, who majors in communication and culture, also enjoys writing and working as a radio deejay.\n"Everybody has their one hobby, whether it be a favorite actor or video game," Jacobson said. "This is my thing; I'm a normal person. It's not like I watch it 24/7. It's just my happy thing"