Oh, how I hate Ohio State

Mary had a little lamb was not my first nursery rhyme. \nIn fact, while my little playmates were singing about lambs and falling bridges, I was singing, Oh, how I hate Ohio State.\nNow, my parents didn't encourage, or condone, hatred of any kind. But my mom was, and is, a rabid Michigan fan, and for anyone that doesn't know, to a true Wolverine, the Buckeyes are the anti-Christ.\nLast February, I visited Buckeye Stadium, the Horseshoe, for the first time on my way to cover the IU-OSU men's basketball game. With my mom on the phone, I kicked the stadium. It was a proud moment.\nThis Saturday, I hope the IU football team kicks something else. I hope they embarrass Ohio State so much that when the despicable Ohioans file out of the stadium, they are silent.\nI can think of nothing sweeter.\nColumbus is filled with obnoxious Buckeye fans, big-headed football players and a history of overrated coaches. Remember John Cooper? He may have a winning record, but his teams were masters at the art of choking.\nYes, Ohio State is ranked in the top 10 of the country. Their players are bigger, stronger, faster than IU. They have a defense that, well, they have a defense. That's enough. Their quarterback is a playmaker, and is aided by a young running back who is a Jerome Bettis-wannabe. In other words, he's a bus.\nTheir parking lots are jammed with tailgaters who subsequently find their way into the stadium. The games are often standing room-only…on the roof. Their colors are unchanged, the uniforms the same. The grass is greener, the air is sweeter and the sky is bluer. Oh yeah, and they have a mascot. \nBasically, in terms of football only, Ohio State is superior. In fact, it's ridiculous to think that IU is even comparable to the Buckeyes. Except for one thing.\nOhio State is beatable.\nIt's undeniable, and pretty much preposterous, not to think the same of IU. Obviously, with the whole country betting on the Hoosiers getting massacred on Saturday. And they very well could get taken to the house, humiliated, beat down…you get the picture.\nBUT! IU is overdue for a major upset, and this Saturday is the perfect opportunity.\nOhio State is cocky and over-confident. They are looking past this Saturday's game to a spot in the Bowl Championship Series games.\nThis game doesn't even register on their scale. For IU, it's the perfect time to make waves on the Buckeyes' radar.\nI know, I know, I know. It's a long shot that the Hoosiers can go into a hostile environment and pull out a fantasy-like upset.\nThe fact that IU's rush defense is close to being at the bottom of the Big Ten barrel isn't really encouraging. But, Ohio State's leading rusher, and the nation's second leading rusher, Maurice Clarett, has been plagued with a knee injury, making the task a little easier for IU. (FYI -- Hoosier defense, it's his right knee. I'm not suggesting you take it out or anything, just that you should be aware.)\nIn order to get a victory, here are a few of my tips for an IU success.\n• Defense: See an OSU player running. TACKLE HIM. And PUH-LEEZE, make sure it's before he reaches the endzone.\n• Offense: Switch it up a little bit. Running back Yamar Washington is great, but too many running plays, and even the less-than-intelligent Buckeyes could figure out what's coming. \n• Kickers: See the those two poles at the end of the field? Kick through them.\n• Coaches: Make sure your team is fresh, confident and not the least bit intimidated. Hey, anyone remember former Buckeye Andy Katzenmoyer? Heck of a tackler. Not so much the world's smartest man. Wonder how far the apple falls from the Buckeye football team. If nothing else, at least the Hoosiers don't need eight years of summer school to pass college. Coaches, just keep telling the team that. Maybe that'll pump them up.\nSaturday is full of possibilities. A major upset, an expected loss, an Ohio State grad that knows how to count to 20 with his shoes on.\nAnd for this one, I'm pulling for the Hoosiers to win. And afterwards, for the Horseshoe to crumble. What a quality day that would be.