TV Recap: ‘Gossip Girl,’ “They Shoot Humphreys, Don’t They?”

1,2,3 not only you and me. Got 180 degrees, and I’m caught in between. Yes, I do believe Britney said it best, but I must remind you: everybody loves–ooh–counting.

At least that’s what the writers of Gossip Girl thought.

This week finally brought us the infamous threesome we have been waiting weeks for (you know, the one your parents don’t want you to see). Was it really all it was cracked up to be? No. Will it make for some interesting moments next week? Absolutely.

But I can’t put all my cards out on the table all at once right? Besides, there was plenty of action that didn’t involve the bedroom.

It’s time for Jenny’s societal debut in this year’s cotillion. I’ll be honest, I’m still a bit fuzzy on the details of this whole bit, but I can’t help it. Jenny is still holding onto her queen status and Constance, and that means she’s going to need a really good date to this shindig. Once Eric finds out who Jenny has her eye on he takes it upon himself to ruin Little J’s chances.

Later all of the girls must be paired with an older mentor for cotillion. Obviously our best match for Jenny is Blair. But this doesn’t last long, as the two don’t get along so well about the date arrangements. Another random debutante told Jenny what Eric did, but didn’t know the full story, leading Jenny to believe Blair was in charge.

So now, both Eric and Blair are upset with Jenny. Let the battle begin.

Serena is also a debutante mentor, but we’re never really shown any of that. Besides, she’s too busy getting a job with Trip Van Der Bilt–supposedly with her minor PR experience. It’s obvious that this is all about their flirtation. I’ll save us some time on this one and just get to the point: Serena realizes Trip’s reasoning, he denies it. Serena continues to work there, their affair is eminent.

This bad decision on Serena’s part is just something else for she and Blair to argue about. Yes, the two are still fighting. I find that Chuck put it best when describing it to Nate. “Basically, how each one loves the other, more that the other loves her.” To which Nate simply says, “Can you even fight about that?”

Luckily for these girls, Chuck has a plan to get them back together. Even luckier—they get to miss out on most of the cotillion nonsense. Blair doesn’t really need to be there anyway, as Eric can handle the plans they’ve set into motion.

Blair and Eric have decided to take another girl under their wing, and make her the belle of the ball. Also a part of their plan: stealing Jenny’s date. I must say, it was pretty satisfying to see Jenny look like a fool when her name was called with no escort, leaving her to just walk out in embarrassment.  How did Blair and Eric get Jenny’s date to escort the, ‘media tells me she’s not very pretty’ girl? Well let’s just say that he and Eric spent a lot of time together at summer camp one year–enough for blackmail.

Chuck’s plan? Oh that, yeah. This is one of those stereotypical setups. Chuck has invited both girls upstairs, but on false pretenses. The girls then become trapped in the elevator, thanks to Chuck, and are forced to talk things out. Nothing special here, mostly just Serena’s daddy and self-worth issues.

Our cotillion actually ends quite peacefully. Blair and Serena are reunited, Nate has escorted Jenny–putting her back on top, and all three girls are getting along. Jonathan does break up with Eric for becoming such a devious person, but this relationship was never too thrilling anyway–not a major loss for me.

Finally, I bring us to our ‘big event’ of the week. Olivia has found out that she will be leaving soon to film her next movie in the trashy vampire series she’s been doing. So, Dan and Vanessa take it upon themselves to show her what  a good time in college is all about. The two have found some sort of generic list with plenty of random games to play, parties to attend, and laws to break.

Our last piece on the checklist: a threesome.

After the trio has been out partying all night drinking, God only knows how much, they go for it. I’m surprised that Olivia is actually into sharing her boyfriend with a girl that once tried to break them up. But then that’s it. The three kiss once or twice, and it’s over–fast forward to lying in bed the next day. That’s what all the fuss was about? I believe I’ve seen more racy moments on The Price Is Right. It was slightly fun to see, or see the suggestion, that Lizzie McGuire isn’t so sweet anymore though.

Our final shocker of the night: Olivia’s movie has been cancelled. To which I say: of course. Now these three will actually have to deal with this instead of shipping it off to Hollywood.

Before we go, I must have one more small rant. This week’s soundtrack was good. Really good. A remake of “Whatever You Like,” that was wonderful, and a good snippet of Leighton Meester’s single, “Somebody to Love.” Of course it’s only going to get better now that we know Gaga is going to be stopping by.

What did you guys think of the sex-capades? A little blown out of proportion? Are you liking the music choices this week? Also, what could Eric’s plan for Jenny be?