It’s all the little things that build up over time.
The catcalls, the sexist jokes, the frequently patronizing tones. It’s not that these things don’t happen in the United States, it’s that they don’t happen as much.
After a late-night class, IU junior Jules Daugherty is sitting at the bar with her friend Lucas Saito Valeriano. A feminist rally is raging across the street, something very common at their rather liberal university in São Paulo, where Daugherty is studying abroad.
But even among the friends she’s made here, where the environment is so liberal, Jules gets tired of the underlying misogyny.
“Most men believe that they can’t be friends with women,” Valeriano said. “In fact, about 99 percent of them believe that. If they’re talking to a girl, it’s most likely not for friendship.”
Jules said she often feels like her male friends treat her like a child. If she tells them her aspirations or academic interests, the response is something along the lines of, “That’s so cute.”
Sexism here has many of the same characteristics as it does in the U.S., only ?amplified.
Coming from IU, platonic relationships between males and females have always seemed normal.
Jules said she thinks she has just as many male friends as female friends in Indiana.
In Brazil, it’s possible to be friends with a man, but only if they see you as “one of the guys.”
While in the U.S. it’s still possible to have a friendship with a man and keep your femininity, here it’s almost as if women must act more masculine to be seen and respected as friends rather than sexual objects.
When it comes to sex, there is a double standard between men and women.
The more women a man sleeps with, the more respect he earns. But women who sleep with a lot of men are perceived as sluts.
It’s something that’s very familiar in the U.S. As American college students, we discuss the topic often. Most of us agree that the double standard exists and is sexist.
The difference is a lack of a conversation. In Brazil, the topic is not up for ?debate.
The same can be said for catcalling and street ?harassment.
Being female and living in Brazil means catcalls and uncomfortable stares are something you expect every time you leave the house.
Most American women living in Brazil will tell you they don’t necessarily think Brazil is less safe or that they change their wardrobe in order to feel more secure, just that the constant stares and crude remarks get very old.
If you ask a Brazilian man why he continues to harass women on the streets, he will likely tell you the catcalls should be taken as compliments.
Whether in the U.S. or in Brazil, they are a form of harassment. But in Brazil especially, the woman tends to be viewed as an object for male enjoyment.
The degree of sexism within casual relationships between men and women speaks to more serious, institutionalized sexism in Brazil.
There is no immediate cure, besides perhaps a shift in attitudes among ?college-aged men. Achieving this is just as complicated in Brazil as it is in the U.S.
Jules Daugherty contributed reporting.
